It’s time to get off my butt.

life if short.

i had an epiphinous-type event the other night. i found my breaking point. i’m getting off my butt and doing something about it. God’s kingdom is too great for me to still be on my ass thinking things will happen themselves. life is too short to think that i have plenty of time. the calling is too strong to keep ignoring it.

so ever since i’ve gotten married i’ve been overwhelmed. i’ll be the first to admit. i couldn’t handle it. i’m a worryer. i’m obsessive compulsive. it’s hard for me to let things go. a perfectionist.

i was convinced i had no time for anything besides eating, sleeping, working and driving. i commute about 30-40 minutes to work everyday. it’s not my favorite thing to do. i even had myself convinced that squeezing a quiet time in would be a challenge. convinced i had no extra time.

so when it came to church, i go on sundays. i listen and learn. and go home. don’t get me wrong, I am not just going through the motions. i am a Christ-follower and love God. but that’s just it. i hate that that is all i do. there has got to be more. i keep having the feeling that just attending church is not enough for me. take it a step further. i want to volunteer. it’s an eating passion. but i don’t want to just greet people at the door. i mean that is important, but i want to do more! i feel a passion to do more.

i just have one problem.

i don’t know how to start. or where to go. or what to do.

so even though the passion is strong, the calling is great the overwhelming feeling of not knowing where to go or what to do has been keeping me on my butt about it.

so i hit my breaking point the other night. and with the help of my husband, hopefully today all of that will change.

it’s a big deal to me. no sure why. i don’t care if i clean toilets or wash windows. there’s a fire under my butt that’s making me move.

it’s strange.

i have watched my husband truly enjoy what he does. for once. it kills me cause i truly want to experience the joy he has.

from the book, in a pit with a lion on a snowy day: what if the life you really want, and the future God wants for you, is hiding right now in your biggest problem, your worst failure…your greatest fear?……..that is sooooo me.

i’m getting off my butt.

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One Response to “It’s time to get off my butt.”

  1. Oh kim, this is so wonderful. I am happy for you to being doing something about all those emotions instead of pushing them back. I have found that with a good support group one can do it all – stay up till midnight cleaning, have quiet time, & make art! I know you have the support group, so make it happen. I say BRAVO to you!

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